How do I even begin to put this into words? For that matter, how do I put into words for the whole world to see, what my heart feels? 23 years ago, I had a baby girl. I had no idea – none whatsoever – how having a baby would change my life from what it was to what it became. It was like I was born on the day she was. I was living and breathing before that, and loving too – first my parents and family, then friends, then my husband and finally God. But when that little baby looked at me and I saw what God had been doing for 40 weeks – right INSIDE of me – I was totally blown away. When I felt the depth of love a mother feels for her child, I was aghast at how much God loves us, and how great His sacrifice for us. To give your only son, that you love and are pleased with, to pay a penalty he did not owe. Wow, it’s mindboggling. Those were the early days of my daughter’s infancy, right along with sleepless nights and trying to figure out what to do to keep this demanding little person happy, those were some hard but glorious days. As she grew, my heart continued to swell with love until I knew it could not hold any more, not a drop. Somehow it kept growing, without bursting until her little brother came along. I vividly remember wondering if I could actually love another child like I loved her. Just like that, he was born and voila – the capacity to love multiplied immediately. How could it be that anyone could love someone as much as I love them? Then came the day they would look at me and say “Mama” for the first time. What a truly lovely sound. Then, “I love you, mama.” How does a mere toddler know what love is? How can they know that as a mother, I would give anything, ANYTHING, to keep them safe and care for them. I would trade my life for theirs at the drop of a hat if called for and if possible. I would give all I have and ever will have if called upon without a second thought to protect them. A toddler can’t know that, neither can a child, or a teenager. But a mother – she knows. Now my little baby daughter is all grown up and is going to be a mother herself, then she will know it too. I can’t wait to see our daughter meet her daughter, to hold her close and breathe her in. To experience the softness of her baby’s sigh, the sweet feel of her daughter in her arms, that moment when this miracle of God happens and her life is forever changed. What a joy and blessing. I never take it for granted, not one minute of it. I have truly loved being a mom to my two awesome kids and my life has been so transformed by them. I know they are going to continue to change the world for the better as they serve God. I am thankful and humbled to have played a part in this life God has given them.
Since Nicki is expecting, we went out and had a great maternity session. Please enjoy these images of impending motherhood. I love you, Nicki! You will be a great mother to little Noelia, and Jaron will be a wonderful daddy. What fun you have in store! Cherish every minute.